Updated: Jan 26
“Listen boy (using boy instead of the actual name of the person so as to avoid unnecessary drama that comes along :p) You need to listen up and get it straight in your head that nobody in this world can tell anybody what they are capable of doing and what they aren’t, especially to a woman, because we have spent ages hearing the same phrase, but you know what? Your time is over because women today work out there hard enough to prove their mettle and to shut mouths of people like you."
Honestly speaking I was much more subtle with my language in real, when I said it to a person who told me that I can’t write on a certain topic but the intent was same and so should be yours.
We all have our own stories of people who constantly try to control us or demotivate us, and we have spent a huge chunk of our lives ignoring it or cutting excuses for it. Enough damage has been done already, thus now you need to decide up for yourself, what do you want to look up to “the way you see things” or the way they see, the way they see you or the way you do.
You got to do what you want to, irrespective of anything else - the way you look, your slurry English , your not so strong financial background, you are divorced or bisexual , none of this should come in your way to achieve your goals.
“Things which matter the Most must never be affected by the things which matter the Least” – Aakansha Tandon (Yes, I have twisted Goethe’s words because I disagree with him).
“You have got only one life to live, live it to the fullest, don’t be a slave of other's thoughts, advices or suggestions. Your occupation, qualification, lifestyle, hairstyle, sexual choices shouldn’t be at the mercy or goodwill/liking of someone else.”
I know it’s not that easy to adapt to the change as it is to say especially in a country where every second person is willing to make choices for you or give you free advice to make your life better. But I am not here to be theoretical I've got real examples ,these women of strong mettle proved it to the world what they have got and they pump oozing confidence in my blood.
To begin with is my nearest and dearest friend (Harshita Yadav), I don’t think I have enough words to describe her, I think of her and I feel I don’t even have 1/100th of the confidence as her. A woman loves her hair more than she loves her money/ food, (you don’t agree? ask your hairstylist next time) and she had the most beautiful, flowy hair, everyone adored them, so will you (look at the photos below). This lady one fine day decided that she wants better hair, her hair has been damaged & wants a regrowth. Next day she visits the salon and gets rid of them, all of them like totally bald…. Can you imagine the amount of guts that it takes to do that in a society where prerequisite to live as a woman is to look beautiful? She left everyone awestruck of her bold and confident self, she said “people treat me like a cancer victim, the ones who never saw me before initiated conversations”. She believes that her beauty is internal and is independent of hair on her head. She still roams around with the same confidence. I salute her for the choice she has made for herself, she doesn’t care about what anyone else would think of her and that makes her the strongest.
Next up is the story of Harnaam Kaur, who has made history in the world of fashion, despite of being a victim of Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and being the odd one out, she made people raise their hands to clap for her rather than raising their brows. She became the first fully bearded female model to walk a runway show, she walked at London Fashion Week for a Jewelry designer. According to Yahoo! Style, Harnaam's facial hair is predominantly down to her PCOS. Having first started to grow facial hair when she was 11, Harnaam used hair removal treatments to take it off until she was 16. After years of feeling shame and battling bullies, she had a change of heart, deciding to accept her body as it was — facial hair and all."
Next on the list is - Nobody needs an introduction for her; her name says it all…. “Winnie Harlow, the Canadian fashion model and public spokesperson on the skin condition Vitiligo, despite being called a 'cow, zebra' and dealing with bullies for half of her life it didn’t botheredher. She made it her strength. She gained attention as a contestant on the U.S. television series America's Next Top Model due to her condition and rest is history. She is one of the most popular models who was seen at Met Gala too.
I know the topic of this blog is cliché and I know it won't sell much but I still wanted these thoughts to reach out. Not to consume your time anymore, I'll leave you with a question here and I want you to ask this to yourself whenever you feel incapable or any less.
1.Who will be the winner and survivor of this battle with the self?
2. Will this world ever witness a second you? Howsoever you are?
I just hope that you found it worth reading. This piece has been edited by Shubhangi Singh, I will always be thankful to you. You can follow these women on instagram @harshita2118 ; @harnaamkaur ; @winnieharlow .